I Am A POWERFUL Woman

More Joy. More Peace. More Power.

Tag: Bill Cumming (Page 1 of 2)

Broken

March 16, 2022 / / 0 Comments

I Would Never

My mom and I visited The Hemingway House in 2015.

For someone who judged Ernest Hemingway’s character pretty harshly, I feel like I quote him often in blog posts.

The longer I live, the more I see I’m in no position to judge another person for anything ever. I believe we’re capable of making the same life choices if given the same set of circumstances, decisions that either enrich or bring destruction to our lives.

We tend to sit in judgment of other people based on our experiences, not theirs. We’re all just humans being humans. No one is without reproach.

“The world breaks everyone and afterward many are strong at the broken places.” ― Ernest Hemingway

A Farewell to arms
Hemingway’s writing studio and safari trophy room

Are You Broken?

Three years ago, when I was going through an especially tough time, my wise friend, Linda Pritcher posed the question, “Are you broken?”

I felt very broken.

“Do you look at other people and think, ‘They are broken.'”

My answer was no.

I don’t see anyone as broken beyond repair. They aren’t broken, just a little cracked.

This made me think about the Japanese art form Kintsugi, where the cracks in a once-perfect pottery piece are filled with gold, making that pottery one of a kind and more valuable than it was to begin with.

We are kind of like pottery. We’re born perfect and collect cracks as we grow.

Conversations with Linda always leave me uplifted. That day was no exception. For as long as I held onto the thought that I was just like everyone else, I was able to show myself grace. Over the years I ended up forgetting this truth.

I’m going to write down I AM NOT BROKEN. I’m going to stick it somewhere I can be reminded of often.

Bringing It Full Circle

I was having a discussion with a friend about some messy situations in my life. I’ve felt so broken over the last few months. So hopeless. This stronger at the broken places quote came to mind.

Ernest and Pauline

Through personal examination of the quote and my previous feelings of accusation against Ernie H, I’ve discovered that Sarah Boucher and Ernest Hemingway are more alike than we are different. I’m no better than him. When put to the test, I could easily take some of the same paths he took if I’d had his childhood, teenage experiences, friends, marriages, so on and so forth.

Someone in my shoes would’ve made similar choices as I have.

If I were in your circumstances, I’d most likely make many of the same choices you’ve made.

You and I are the same. We are not broken people, just cracked, and there’s a neverending supply of gold to fill said cracks, to make us stronger at our broken places.

My mom told me years ago, “You are neither more valuable nor less valuable than anyone else.”

Bill Cumming, my friend, and mentor would later reinforce this lesson. I would encourage you to visit Bill’s and Linda’s websites. They are both wonderful resources.

Oh, and Mr. Hemingway, I feel I owe you an apology.

The Sixth Sense

Ernest Hemingway, I see you.

No One is Coming to Save Me

May 12, 2019 / / 4 Comments

That Was Then

When Jason moved out of the house two years ago, my friend Joe said, “You’re going to be a different person in a year.”  He was referring to the “roller coaster” of emotions and changes that come with separation, divorce, and finding your place in the world.  I didn’t believe him at all. I was who I’d always been and I was determined to stay that way. Joe was well into his own “roller coaster” ride and much to my dismay, knew exactly what he was talking about.

In 2011, I experienced a BOOM in my personal development journey.  It was like an emotional Renaissance. I felt so ALIVE…so excited to be growing…to be thinking invigorating, life changing thoughts.

2012 brought the first separation and heartbreak. I tried to maintain the positive attitude, but I was in crisis.  I used what I’d learned from the previous year to stay afloat. That’s all I did. It’s basically where I found myself this morning, looking at my surroundings, overwhelmed and in tears. Actually I know that I’ve regressed back into a victim mindset.  At some point, I laid my POWER at my feet and have stood by helplessly, waiting for someone…anyone to come along, pick it up, and place it back in my hands. Friends have tried to tell me it’s there, but I didn’t believe them. There’s no way it would still be where I laid it down. I never even looked down to see if they were telling me the truth.

Stuck in the Muck

Over the last couple of years, I’ve grieved.  I’ve experienced intense loneliness.  I’ve been afraid. I’ve been immobilized. I’ve felt hopeless.  I’ve made choices I regret. I’ve turned into someone I don’t recognize.  I’m afraid to run into people from my past because I don’t want them to see what a mess my life is.  

I feel like a baby grown up. I don’t even know where to begin or what to do to save myself. I’ve just been surviving all these years. I’ve stayed trapped in my head with all of these negative thoughts bullying me around day in and day out.

What I hear all day are words like, “Failure…hopeless situation…incapable…impossible…lonely…all alone…”

In the words of my friend Rachelle, “What the crap?!”

On a particularly rough day last fall, I recognized that my thoughts weren’t exactly working for me. I was having trouble snapping out of my funk. Music wasn’t helping lift my mood, so I turned to The Happier Podcast for a dose of positivity.  Gretchen Rubin and Liz Craft feel like old friends at this point. They helped me through a dark time, but it wasn’t enough. My POWER was still lying at my feet.

Some time around Christmas,  my friend Jeri gave me the book 40 Days to a Joy-Filled Life.

This Is Now

Between the podcast, the book, heart to heart conversations with Bill Cumming and Linda Pritcher, and the ongoing love and support from my tribe, this morning I looked down at my feet and was delighted to see that my POWER was still there, waiting for me to pick it back up. Kind of like Dorothy’s ruby red slippers. I had it all along.

While friends and family can cheer me on and hold my hand when the days seem dark and scary, they can’t do this hard work  for me. I see again, like I did in 2011 when I decided that the victim mindset was no way to live, that no one is coming to save me.

With my POWER firmly in my grasp, I still don’t see HOW this is all going to work out, but I have hope that it will. HOPE.

From time to time, I catch this beautiful vision for my POWERFUL woman life.  

A life where I–

  • Indulge in creative projects
  • Think outside the box
  • Am fearless
  • Am a good support system for my children, emotionally AND financially
  • Have confidence and embrace my individuality
  • Believe the impossible for myself and others
  • Love with my whole heart (including myself)
  • Am fully alive and present
  • Have overflowing peace and joy
  • Have an inviting home
  • Have enough and then some to share

I won’t have time to worry about whether or not there’s a partner to share the journey with. If one should happen to join me down the road, great.  If not, great– because I will truly be happy in this life I will have created for myself.

Action Makes Traction

I have to guard my thoughts and words.  I can’t say, “Victim. Broken. Hopeless,” and expect to see strength, healing, and success.

I’m not stuck.  This isn’t how the story ends.  I know this because…MEMES. Memes don’t lie.

I’m ready to make traction.  I’m done being a victim. I own this life.  I own my choices past and present. I own my POWER. I’m moving out of my own way.

This week I’m going to set specific goals so I can track my actions and one day find myself in my vision, looking back on this day with a happy heart.

Even if I don’t make it…if I die next week, I’ll have lived fully until then, proving that happiness is in the journey, not the destination.  Again…Memes don’t lie.

As the gurus say, “Onward.”

And some say, “Onward and upward.”

Thank you for reading.  Thank you for being part of my tribe and for allowing me to be part of yours.

Much Love,

Sarah

If you’ve survived the “roller coaster” and have your feet firmly planted back on solid ground, I’d love to hear your best advice for keeping my hands and feet inside the cart at all times and making it back in one piece. You can share that right here or message/leave a comment over on Facebook. This site probably isn’t the most user friendly at this point (especially on a smart phone.) I’ll work on that.

I Want To Be Drunk All The Time

August 5, 2017 / / 0 Comments

I want to be drunk ALL THE TIME.

First off…my mom raised me better than this.

Sarah Boucher | I Am A Powerful Woman | Rebel

(The picture is from The Greatest Victory and the first video I made…Lol)

My life is probably too much of an open book, but I’ve said in the recent past I’m going to be true to who I am, and if that means some people need to walk away, I’ll learn to deal.

Last night after work, my friend Amador and I went out for drinks. I’ve never understood the appeal of alcohol or why anyone would ever want to get drunk and deal with a hangover the next day.

Jason started drinking beer daily before we separated. He didn’t get drunk. It was just annoying to me because of the expense. I judged him pretty hard and even counted bottles. The EXPENSE!

When I quit being a nag, I’d taste the different beer he brought home and tease him that it all tasted like saltine crackers. He’d sit down with a pack of saltine crackers and drink a beer.  Kind of redundant in my opinion.

Since the separation I’ve dabbled in different fruity drinks and had a buzz 3 or 4 times. I’ve wondered at what point a person is considered drunk. I even Googled it one night with my bottle of coconut rum.

Well I found out last night. I had 2 Bahama Mama’s on an empty stomach. As I sat there laughing and thoroughly enjoying myself I said, “I used to feel like this all the time.”

I did! I used to feel THAT in love with life on a regular basis even in the middle of crappy circumstances – very little money, a marriage falling apart, the stress of raising a house full of kids, and trying to find myself.

I don’t really want to be drunk all the time. My tiny hangover this morning helped me recognize that, but I do want to get back into the head space where I experience that drunk on life feeling.

Life has been such a turd this last decade that I truly believe it will never be as I would have it, but that’s neither here nor there. Even in the middle of the occasional disappointments and chaos, I get to choose to feel defeated or to look around at my blessings and make a plan for the day that will leave me feeling giddy about life.

If I did it once, I can do it again.

I called Bill yesterday. He asked me how I was. I teared up and said, “Not great. I should’ve called a couple of months ago.”

I poured out my little broken heart. He offered reassurance as to my humanness and told me to, “Get the (air) hug,” and I told him I’d call him when I got off work.

Forgetting my intent to call, I got drunk instead.

I’m glad I did. To momentarily feel such elation was the perfect reminder that I didn’t used to need alcohol to accomplish that feeling.

I called Bill this morning to wrap up yesterday’s conversation. I told him about my drunken revelation and said I realize my lack of discipline where daily self care is concerned is the missing link between the way I’ve experienced life recently compared to 5 years ago..

He ended the call by saying, “We’re friends for life,” and reminded me that he’s here for me any time.

I so wish YOU had the opportunity to know Bill too. If you did, he’d make the same statements of love and support to you, but you know me instead so I’ll have to share what he’s taught me as I relearn it.

For me to move forward and not be a complete victim of my thinking as I’ve been the last couple of years, there’s 2 main ingredients.

The 1st thought to let in is that I’m loved unconditionally by at least one person. (I’m blessed enough to have more than one person love me this way.) By letting in that unconditional love means just that and it isn’t going anywhere, no matter what crazy choices I make or don’t make, I’ve been able to experience that my value in the world is indeed undisputed, as is yours and everyone else’s. I forget from time to time. This unconditional love is also a pretty great example of God’s love for us.  (Check out the book Real Love.)

The 2nd step is to reflect on a few Self Care thoughts to get myself grounded as my day starts.

  1. Everything is a miracle. (Life is a gift.)
  2. Everything is interconnected. (Every word we speak and action we take makes a difference- good or bad.)
  3. The ONLY thing I have ANY control over is how I CHOOSE to be in the world today. (As much as I’d like to orchestrate the events of my life, it just doesn’t work that way. But I get to choose how to react to what life throws my way.)

And then a 4th thought that’s been useful for me is to be gentle with myself, to treat myself with same love and compassion I show everybody else.  I really need to remember this one especially as of late. I’ve been ridiculously hard on myself and I wouldn’t dare be this way with anybody else.

So life is not as I’d have it here and now, but there is still MUCH to be thankful for and I can only do what I can to make each day a little brighter for myself and others.

Thanks for the reminder Bahama Mama!

I’m looking forward to going through life tipsy on LOVE and all things good.

You can experience the goodness of Bill’s work through his online course What Every Person Can Do.  It’s the next best thing to knowing him personally 🙂

If you have questions about the online course or if you’d be interested in going through the one on one course with me, you can message me.

Showing Up

June 20, 2017 / / 0 Comments

Showing Up

“You’re doing so well,” my friend Angel said to me the other day. From the outside, I may appear to be handling the separation, full time employment (for the first time in my life), the accident, and pending divorce well, but I’ve actually been struggling the entire time. And so I told her how not well I’ve actually been.

Before Jason moved out, I experienced crippling financial stress, loneliness, and hopelessness in just about every area of my life. I was quite overwhelmed. Even though I pushed for growth or separation (which I feel was an act of self love) my self esteem has taken a blow that’s set me back 10 years, back to before I learned anything about taking care of and loving myself. I’m at square one, only this time I can’t unlearn what I’ve learned.

I will eventually recall how to let thoughts go that don’t serve me and replace them with ones that do. I’ll remember that my value is just as great as yours. I will remember that I have choices available, even when I don’t feel like I do, and that choosing to do nothing is still a choice. I’ll remember that I can create my day. I don’t have to exist, reacting to what life tries to serve me on its mediocre platter. I have more control than what I’ve been able to see the last couple of years.

While I can’t control what happens around me, I can control how I react. I can set about putting events into motion and creating a life that I’m excited to live, instead of moping through the rest of my days, defeated and looking for acceptance and love from others, instead of filling my world with Real Love (check out this book if you haven’t yet.)

I used to power through hard times with such hope, knowing I was okay no matter what, thanks to what I learned from Bill Cumming and What Every Person Can Do.

I feel like I’m writing the same post over and over again. It starts out, “I’m struggling, but this is what I’m doing about it.” I keep saying I’m going to lean on the basics of Self Care and being present. I keep telling myself I’m going to give YOU more of my time, but my focus has been way off.

I have bursts of inspiration and for those brief moments, I feel like I’m capable of implementing the dreams I dreamed 6 years ago, when I first learned that I had more control over my thinking and my life. I had lived as a victim, waiting for someone else to give me step by step instructions on what to do next to have a happier existence. I learned I could be an owner (Thank you, Steve Chandler.) I worked on my thinking. I quit looking to anyone else for my happiness, but I’ve slipped back into a victim mindset. I’ve been crushed by my circumstances. I’ve definitely been looking to others to make me feel worthy and fill the void that separation left behind as a parting gift.

There’s No Perfect Tuesday

My friend Bevin told me years ago that there’s never going to be a perfect Tuesday when I wake up and all the problems are fixed…when I’m fixed. Why do I keep thinking I have to have all of my problems fixed to share with you any more? She also said that we can HAVE IT ALL, just not all at the same time.

This journey was never about me having all the answers or any answers really. It was about having an outlet to share what I was learning, as I was learning it, with a tribe of women…my tribe…our tribe… because the people we love and share our lives with, don’t always get us. They don’t always share our vision and even though they love us, they have the potential to crush our dreams instead of giving us the encouragement to GO FOR IT. But you and I get it. We get each other.

My commitment to you today is to show up in some form EVERY DAY, whether it’s a post like this, a goofy 2 or 3 minute video, Facebook live once a week (which still terrifies me) or a quote and a quick hello.

I’m showing up. Thank you for doing the same.

All my love (my REAL LOVE),
Sarah

 

I Am A Powerful Woman

My Last Day

May 15, 2017 / / 4 Comments

Here it is the middle of May.  Life is a bit of blur for me these days.

I’ve shared that I’ve been struggling to “find” happiness consistently over the last year and a half. Jason and I are officially separated.  Having been through it once, I thought it was going to be easy this time around.  No big emotions.

Boy, was I wrong!  For 4 years we’d been attempting to put back together a marriage that’d been severely damaged for 10.  Back in September, we decided together to let this 19 year journey together die.  We continued living under the same roof until the beginning of this month when he moved into his new home.  Four days later, Jason and Amelia were in a serious car wreck and OH MY GOODNESS! did I take an even bigger hit to the well being groin.  Not sure where that’s located, but it sure did hurt.

Here I sit in the middle of the chaos, trying to decide my next move.

I’ve done a great deal of thinking about perfectionism (which despite my disdain for it, I still find that I’m holding myself to its unattainable standard), low self esteem (which I truly believed I’d conquered, but realized the other day I need to go back and re-learn how to love myself right where I am), loneliness (and how to deal with that beast), finances (the lack thereof and how to get more in a way that is emotionally satisfying), friendship, guilt (how to let go and move forward), and a host of other topics all of which I want to discuss right now, but I won’t.

Reflecting on the lack of joy/well being I feel these days, it occurred to me that when I wake up each morning, I’m falling into my days.  I’m not being present.  I’m not being mindful each day of the fact that life is fragile, even after an accident that was an inch or two off from ending in fatalities, had Jason not hit the tree head on.

Jason Boucher/The Awesome Possum/Sarah Boucher/I Am A Powerful Woman

When I have lived like this day might be my last day, I felt lighter emotionally, not weighed down by worry, fear, loneliness, hopelessness.  I felt immeasurable love in my heart not only for my family, but for perfect strangers (WHAT A GOOD SHOW THAT WAS!)  I wanted to LOVE the entire world.  I didn’t take life personally.  I just went about my day with a smile on my face and when life threw a curveball at me, I thought, “Oh well. I’ll be fine or I won’t.  No sense in worrying.”

TODAY COULD BE MY LAST DAY.  

It’s a morbid thought, but some day it WILL BE my very last chance to live a day.  Living like today is it, gives each day a sense of purpose.  I’ve actually been less afraid of dying when I’ve lived like I might kick the bucket tomorrow and that’s HUGE for me.  I’ve spent most of my life afraid of dying.

Way Back When

  • Living with mortality in mind meant more patience in parenting.  I loved my kids where they were instead of trying to “fix” them.
  • I didn’t get my feathers ruffled as easily in disagreements with Jason.  I was able to let him have his opinion without thinking I had to get him to agree with mine.
  • I didn’t take as much personally.
  • I recognized that I was good enough. I had just as much value as anybody else alive and all I could do was my best (not talking about perfectionism here.  It meant I was giving the day and the people in it my all.)
  • I was thoroughly enjoying my journey and the growth I was experiencing.

The Shift

I feel happier thinking about what it felt like to live in that space and I want to be able to do it again consistently.  The good news is, it’s so possible and I can start now.  I just have to get in touch with the realization that there are no guarantees that I’ll be here tomorrow or that you’ll be.

I’m going back to the basics and the Self Care thoughts that Bill Cumming shared with me in his program What One Person Can Do (available in an online course here.)

Everything is a miracle.  Life is a miracle.

Everything/Everyone is interconnected (all 7 billion of us.)

The ONLY thing I can control today, is how I CHOOSE TO BE in the world.

And…

I’m going to stop beating myself up and holding myself to the ridiculous standard of perfectionism. It’ll take some work, but I’ll beat it.  I’m going to love and accept myself the same way I love YOU.

I’m going to quit looking for validation outside of my own body and I’m going to rock this life POWERFUL WOMAN style.

If I tap back into this way of thinking and living, I’m not going to be bogged down with worry.  I’m not going to have time to dwell on imagined scenarios of doom and gloom or even dreams of a happily ever after that may or may not ever be.  If I’m present, I’m living my happily ever after each and every day.  My cup will be running over, even in the middle of an emergency room with blood and stitches and broken bones.  I’ll be full of hope again.  I’ll see the bright side of life and the very real darkness isn’t going to feel so dark, because there’s so much you and I can do to make the load lighter for someone else.

I just have to get out of my head and back into my life.

If you can do it, I can do it and the other way around.

Here are a few closing quotes from The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz.

“The final way to attain personal freedom is to prepare ourselves for the initiation of the dead, to take death ourself as our teacher.

We have just the present to be alive.

And of course I treat the people I love with love because this may be the last day that I can tell you how much I love you.

The love that makes me happy is the love that I can share with you.  Why do I need to deny that I love you?  It is not important if you love me back.  I may die tomorrow or you may die tomorrow.  What makes me happy now is to let you know how much I love you.”

All my love,

Sarah

Sarah Boucher/I Am A Powerful Woman

Take Back The Night

April 24, 2016 / / 0 Comments

A few weeks ago, I got an invitation via Facebook to go to an event called Take Back The Night. My gut reaction was, “Heck no!”

Take Back The Night is a night for survivors of sexual assault, friends, family, and the community to get together to raise awareness about sexual violence. At some point my adamant, “Heck no!” turned into, “Maybe I should consider going.”

On my way into town, I called my mom and asked her to join me. She served on Hope Harbor‘s Board and had been to Take Back The Night in the past.  She accepted the invite.

I’m not a survivor of rape but as a former chronic worrier, that violent act has always been near the top of Sarah B’s Top 10 Fear List.

Even now that I’ve learned I can’t control ANYTHING but how I choose to react to what happens, and now that overwhelming daily fear and worry is a distant memory, self defense comes to mind from time to time. What would I do if someone tried to hurt me? Jujitsu? Pray and hope for the best?

Going that night was important because I wanted to take the first step to acknowledge and deal with my fear.

I didn’t know what to expect but I felt like I was in for an emotional night.

We walked into the church’s fellowship hall and the room was full of mostly women, but plenty of men, children, and dogs as well.

A group from a fraternity had on shirts about respect.

fraternity brothers

We registered and got our free t-shirts.

A woman from Hope Harbor gave an introduction and some statistics.

If I remember correctly, in Kentucky 47% of women and 20% of men are sexually assaulted. That number is higher than the national average. What the heck KY?!

A teenage girl, named Abigail took the stage next. As soon as she started talking I teared up. I don’t do live events very well. Abigail said she would be the voice for those that didn’t feel like they had one. I reigned in my emotions as she went on to deliver a passionate spoken word poem about being strong enough to slay her own Monsters.

After Abigail and two rounds of applause, a university student got up and broke her 2 year silence about having been raped. She talked about hope and not letting this act of violence define her.

After the girls spoke, the lot of us took to the streets and marched around the city square and a couple of blocks.

Take Back The Night 2016

My mom and I may or may not have skipped that last block and taken a short cut back to the church.

When everybody else got back, there was a candle light vigil and a group singing of This Little Light of Mine, followed by a moment of silence for the survivors present.

20160421_190003[1]

Everyone was then invited to an art show and live music at The FFOYA House, a couple of streets over.

My mom sat in the car while I popped in to look at the art.  As I walked around the house looking at the art, I listened in as the women around me introduced themselves to one another and traded credentials. This one teaches social work on campus. That one works at The International Center. As is the theme of my life these days, I stood there asking myself what it is I’m supposed to be doing with my life.

What’s holding me back? Fear? Fear of change? Fear of hard work? Fear of picking the wrong path? Fear of making a move when the most important work I could be doing is in my own home? These are the people that need me more than anybody else. BUT!…will I make a bigger difference in their lives if I push myself to grow, give myself more earning power, and have myself set up to provide fully for them in case tragedy strikes or should my sometimes rocky marriage ultimately crumble?

20160417_115944[1]

An image from the night that had a huge impact on me about the reality of what we were all there for, was a cute little girl about 5 years old with dark skin and brightly colored clothes.  She was stomping happily in a rain puddle while holding up a sign about innocence.

What am I supposed to be doing with my life?

I’m blessed to call Bill Cumming my friend. He’s worked for 30 years to do his part to end violence and he’s invited me into this work with him. He began his important work after realizing he had the capacity to kill the man that raped his then 8 year old daughter.

When I see people in pain from daily hardship or hear of violence, I feel like part of what I’m supposed to be doing with my life is to connect them to Bill and his program, What One Person Can Do. He’s conducted this life changing program in schools, churches, prisons, corporations, with individuals, and is currently working with the Vermont Air National Guard.

Lord willing and the creek don’t rise, I’m going to try to get Bill to Take Back The Night next year as a speaker.

If you haven’t watched Bill’s Tedx Talk yet, what are you waiting for? 🙂

Would you like to have a conversation with Bill or me about this program or about any possibilities that came up for you while you were watching?  You can reach us here.

As I was driving into town that night, and my mom and I were discussing the event to come, facing my fear of bodily harm and the pesky details of the unknown future were playing in the back of my mind. Even though I spend a minuscule amount of time fearful or worried these days, I noticed that night that I still have plenty of fears yet to conquer and except for sky diving, I’m up for the challenge. Bring it!

Much love and peace!
Sarah

I Will Not Sit In Silence

April 14, 2016 / / 0 Comments

busy mom

What started out as sheer annoyance with a family member last night has turned into this mushy desire to get involved.

Have you ever known somebody that has an answer for everything, even if it’s the wrong answer?  That’s my cuz.

Last night, he was being pretty nasty to his wife and kids and I’d had all I could stand.

He snapped at his daughter, “Stop being an idiot and don’t cry if you wreck. Crying’s for sissies.”

She walked by me with her tear streaked face and I couldn’t sit in silence.

Too often I sit in silence when people are being borderline ugly to each other, so I spoke up. “You’re NOT an idiot and it’s PERFECTLY okay to cry if you get hurt.”

Later on, he and I were talking about parenting and I urged him, “Don’t call your kids idiots. You’ve got to build them up. You’ve got to tell them they’re strong.  They’re going to grow up having such low self esteems and then they’ll turn to mean men for validation.”

He sputtered some nonsense back at me. I asked him, not out of meanness but out of curiosity, “Did your parents call you an idiot?” His eyes seemed to soften as he shared with me the list of worse names he was called.

The thing is, all names are bad names and I would argue that being called idiot your whole life is just as hurtful as being called a mother fucker.  (I’m not slamming his parents. I’m sure if I asked them, they’d have similar stories to share about their childhood.  We ALL make mistakes as parents and my kids will happily list off every single time I’ve been hateful and completely lost it…but, I digress.)

I was SO frustrated with him last night that I wanted to hit him with Lorraine (his belt) but this morning, I really want the opportunity to sit down and tell him there’s a better way than all of that stress and anger that he’s currently carrying around. I want to say, “Trust me. This works. You can be happier. I WANT you to be happy. I love you all. Please give me a chance to share.” (This side of the family isn’t mushy at all and this would totally freak them out.  I’d probably get shunned.)

I don’t know that I’ll ever get the chance to share with him but for some reason (and thank you for doing so) YOU are reading this and I CAN share it with YOU.

The What One Person Can Do conversation is a life changer.  I know this because it changed mine. It not only helped me see that I’m capable of doing tasks that I once found hard or overwhelming, but it helped me through one of the hardest times in my life, being separated from my husband; and it’s been extremely useful in reconciling. I use what I learned on a DAILY basis to help my day go more smoothly and to love on the people around me.

If I could give you one gift, it would be this conversation/program. Give it a chance. If you’re struggling with anger, overwhelm, depression, stress or you’re worried about someone you love who’s struggling, GO THROUGH THE PROGRAM. You’ll feel more peace in dealing with your own set of rough circumstances or in being there for your friends and family.

It’s a conversation for ALL people because it’s about the basics of being a person. It’s not rocket science. It’s not information that’s not also being shared in other places, but it’s been put together in such a way that you’re not just learning about it, you’re experiencing it and it’s useful all day every day.

This program needs more exposure. Look at it. Go through it but don’t stop there.  Figure out how to share it with people you care about: your immediate family, your church, your schools, your prisons, your community. Get in touch with Bill Cumming, the program’s founder and ask him to come speak at one of those places. Ask him to work with your family.  Ask me to. I tend to defer to Bill because he’s been at this for 30 years and I’m new at it, but if he’s busy, ask me 😉

The more people that understand their own value, the less damage we’ll all do to each other and the less damage we’ll all have to deal with in the form of road rage, broken homes, drugs, rape, murder, corrupt corporations and governments. No, we can’t fix all the world’s problems or all the broken people, but we can do our part to make our little corner a nicer place to be.

“Sometimes you need to believe in people, even if the cost seems too high. Because the real cost of not believing in people is huge.” -Chris Morris

What One Person Can Do is available as an online course here or it’s available one on one, via phone or skype. Contact information for Bill Cumming and I can be found here.

Don’t put this off. Your world needs a joyful, peace filled YOU!

Love,
Sarah

I’ve included Bill’s Tedx Talk below so you can “meet” him.

 

I Want Balance, Lots and Lots of Balance

April 30, 2015 / / 0 Comments

You know those days when there’s nothing to be upset about but you just feel down or unsettled? I’ve been feeling that way lately and I discovered the reason while listening to a Zig Ziglar audio a few days ago.

Zig was talking about the 7 areas of our life that, when worked on, leave us feeling a sense of balance and set us up to lead a more successful life.  As he was talking, I recognized that my life is pretty dang unbalanced and knew instantly what was bothering me the most and how to fix it.

7 areas of life

Another reason I get frustrated and feel “off” from time to time is because I try to tackle all 7 areas at once.  I’m all over the place and I’ve struggled to move forward with any consistency in any one of these areas.

Why am having so much difficulty moving forward?

Bill and I discuss this problem in today’s video.  (We had a technical glitch at the end but the audio continues.)

Sarah, I, 4_24_15 from Bill Cumming on Vimeo.

If you missed last week’s video, click here.

For the Ziglar audio, click here.  (There’s a big pause halfway through the audio but it picks back up after a couple of minutes.)

I truly appreciate your presence in the P-dub Hub and over on Facebook!  Feel free to share your thoughts or questions about everything posted.  I WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU!  Post  inspiring videos, songs, and posts on the wall.

What I’d really really love is if YOU share your experience of growing in your POWER, accomplishments (big or little as much and often as you’d like to share) or a post about the women in your life who inspire you.

 So let the sharing begin!

 I’m so happy to be connected to each of you and want only the best for YOU!

Sarah

P.S. I’d like to encourage you, if you’re struggling or dealing with a loved one in pain, to check out What Every Person Can Do.  It’s incredibly affordable.  12 weeks of support for what 1 hour of counseling would cost!  But…and I know this firsthand, even reasonably priced is not an option sometimes, so don’t write this off.  Partial and full scholarships are available for those that need them and are serious about going through the work.

Loving Kindness, Relationships, and Parenting

April 23, 2015 / / 0 Comments

I’m EXCITED to share with you the first, of what I hope will be many, short recorded discussions with Bill Cumming, founder of The Boothby Institute.  Bill has been my mentor and friend for four years. His program What Every Person Can Do, now available in an online course as well as one on one, has been a life changer for me.  I consider it an honor to know him and work with him on projects.  I walk away from every conversation wanting others to be able to benefit from his loving kindness and friendship too.

Bill has no desire to be in the lime light.  His work is to point everybody back to themselves and the power, peace, and love that is in each of us, so that we can live joyful lives and the world will be a healthier safer place for all of us.  I’d be okay with that.

This video is LOADED with takeaways.  (I was not as angry as I look. I promise.)

Bill touches on unconditional love in healthy relationships and in parenting, what that kind of love feels like, and how to stay calm when the kids are pushing all of your buttons.

zoom_3 from Bill Cumming on Vimeo.

I’d LOVE your feedback.  Was this video useful?  Would you like to hear more about any of the subjects talked about in this video?  Do you have other questions about any area of your life or concern that you’d like Bill and I to address next?  I’m looking forward to your comments!

I’d like to encourage you, if you’re struggling or if you are dealing with a loved one in pain, check out What Every Person Can Do.  It’s incredibly affordable.  12 weeks of support for what 1 hour of counseling would cost!  But…and I know this firsthand, even reasonably priced is not an option sometimes, so don’t write this off.  Partial and full scholarships are available for those that need them and are serious about going through the work.

Thanks for watching and thanks for your feedback.

Sarah

 

Why Have a Mind?

October 29, 2014 / / 0 Comments

why have a mind

Keep an open mind. Be open to new thoughts and experiences.

Don’t shut out possibilities because you’ve made up your mind a long time ago that life is the way it is.

Embrace life! Embrace people who see the world differently than you do. We’re all just people.

Not a SINGLE one of us has more worth than another.

I don’t have less worth than Mother Teresa.

Am I A Fool

I don’t have more worth than someone who has committed rape or murder. I may be less of a threat, but my life is not more valuable than theirs or less valuable than Mother Teresa’s and neither is yours.

Don’t agree with me or find it hard to accept that you’re made of the same stuff Mother Teresa was?

Do you want to talk about it?

I do. How about this Monday?
Grab your spot on Monday night’s call here.
https://iamapowerfulwoman.net/person/

Be there or be square. 🙂
Just joking. I’m looking forward to talking with YOU Monday night.

Love,
Sarah

Sarah Boucher blog picture

Sarah Boucher happily encourages women to grow in their power daily at I Am A Powerful Woman. Come join the conversation there.

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