Tag Archives: Self Love

Showing Up

Showing Up

“You’re doing so well,” my friend Angel said to me the other day. From the outside, I may appear to be handling the separation, full time employment (for the first time in my life), the accident, and pending divorce well, but I’ve actually been struggling the entire time. And so I told her how not well I’ve actually been.

Before Jason moved out, I experienced crippling financial stress, loneliness, and hopelessness in just about every area of my life. I was quite overwhelmed. Even though I pushed for growth or separation (which I feel was an act of self love) my self esteem has taken a blow that’s set me back 10 years, back to before I learned anything about taking care of and loving myself. I’m at square one, only this time I can’t unlearn what I’ve learned.

I will eventually recall how to let thoughts go that don’t serve me and replace them with ones that do. I’ll remember that my value is just as great as yours. I will remember that I have choices available, even when I don’t feel like I do, and that choosing to do nothing is still a choice. I’ll remember that I can create my day. I don’t have to exist, reacting to what life tries to serve me on its mediocre platter. I have more control than what I’ve been able to see the last couple of years.

While I can’t control what happens around me, I can control how I react. I can set about putting events into motion and creating a life that I’m excited to live, instead of moping through the rest of my days, defeated and looking for acceptance and love from others, instead of filling my world with Real Love (check out this book if you haven’t yet.)

I used to power through hard times with such hope, knowing I was okay no matter what, thanks to what I learned from Bill Cumming and What Every Person Can Do.

I feel like I’m writing the same post over and over again. It starts out, “I’m struggling, but this is what I’m doing about it.” I keep saying I’m going to lean on the basics of Self Care and being present. I keep telling myself I’m going to give YOU more of my time, but my focus has been way off.

I have bursts of inspiration and for those brief moments, I feel like I’m capable of implementing the dreams I dreamed 6 years ago, when I first learned that I had more control over my thinking and my life. I had lived as a victim, waiting for someone else to give me step by step instructions on what to do next to have a happier existence. I learned I could be an owner (Thank you, Steve Chandler.) I worked on my thinking. I quit looking to anyone else for my happiness, but I’ve slipped back into a victim mindset. I’ve been crushed by my circumstances. I’ve definitely been looking to others to make me feel worthy and fill the void that separation left behind as a parting gift.

There’s No Perfect Tuesday

My friend Bevin told me years ago that there’s never going to be a perfect Tuesday when I wake up and all the problems are fixed…when I’m fixed. Why do I keep thinking I have to have all of my problems fixed to share with you any more? She also said that we can HAVE IT ALL, just not all at the same time.

This journey was never about me having all the answers or any answers really. It was about having an outlet to share what I was learning, as I was learning it, with a tribe of women…my tribe…our tribe… because the people we love and share our lives with, don’t always get us. They don’t always share our vision and even though they love us, they have the potential to crush our dreams instead of giving us the encouragement to GO FOR IT. But you and I get it. We get each other.

My commitment to you today is to show up in some form EVERY DAY, whether it’s a post like this, a goofy 2 or 3 minute video, Facebook live once a week (which still terrifies me) or a quote and a quick hello.

I’m showing up. Thank you for doing the same.

All my love (my REAL LOVE),
Sarah

 

I Am A Powerful Woman

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5 Posts YOU Loved

5 Posts YOU Loved

In a recent blog I talked about the writer’s BLOCK I’ve had for some time. Between that and facebook’s recent algorithm changes, I’ve mostly been sharing great posts from other pages. I enjoy sharing what encourages me. I don’t share random thoughts or posts from others. You’ll be able to tell what’s going on in my world by the posts I share. Occasionally I share posts that don’t apply to me. If I do, it’s because I think it might encourage a friend going through a difficult time, but mostly I see one and I’m like, “I really needed to see this today.”

I think it’s interesting to look at the ones that get the most response from you.

Here are the Top 5 Posts YOU Loved from this past week.
Click on each image to be connected to the corresponding facebook page.

#5 From Joy of Mom
Joy of Mom Trust Your Gut
I posted this one because I hear my gut more clearly than I used to. That doesn’t mean I always listen, but I know the minute I tell someone I’m going to do something whether it’s in line with my gut/soul’s vision.

#4 From Sara Brown – Use it 2 lose it
You Are Amazing
This one was shared because I think all of you are absolutely AMAZING women and I want to encourage you to see yourselves that way.

#3 From Womenworking.com
Love Yourself
When I was at rock bottom 7 years ago, I asked my mom, who happens to be a therapist (her words come in handy in rock bottom moments like these) how I could get some confidence. I felt completely useless and worthless. She told me about Don Miguel Ruiz’s The Four Agreements and then she said, “You are neither more nor less important than anyone else.” All of that NEW information was a turning point for me. It wasn’t an instant fix. I had to work on it, but over time I have come to see myself as worthy of love from myself and it’s made a HUGE difference. I want everyone struggling with low self esteem to experience that difference too.

#2 From Sue Fitzmaurice, Author
Get Out of Your Head
I’ve spent way too many days stuck in my head. It can be a very unpleasant place to be stuck when it’s filled with worry, fear, or self loathing. I just finished reading Finish Line Feeling by Liz Ferro. I love the way she describes what running does for her. “Running is a time during which your soul is both purged and rejuvenated. Running with a good friend is the best remedy for what ails you that a person could wish for, as your sweat washes away the sludge built up in your mind and your heart. It’s as if your problems somehow sweat themselves out of your pores, becoming dried-up salt that you can simply brush away.” I’m pretty sure that whatever means of exercise one uses, similar results are produced.I want to spend the least amount of time trudging around in my head as possible.

#1 From A Mighty Girl
Self Love
This post got the most likes this week. My theory is that as moms, we all want to spare our daughters the grief and crap we’ve been through in learning to love ourselves. The quicker we can recognize our value and learn to love ourselves, the better off our daughters will be. They’ll know how special they are from the time they are little and be able to get to living life to the fullest at an earlier age. This is what I want for my girls and my boys.

I LOVE to hear your thoughts, so always feel free to make comments on posts no matter what page they’re from. Let me know how you are.

I hope you have an AMAZING week. Don’t forget about Self Care πŸ™‚

4 Self Care Thoughts

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