Tag Archives: Andy Andrews

You Don’t Have to Apologize

Andy Andrews quote

You Don’t Have to Apologize
I have been known to take responsibility and apologize for many things that are not my fault. I was dubbed Sorry Sarah in fourth grade because I constantly said, “I’m sorry.”

It was not until I apologized for walking near someone in the grocery store (I wasn’t even in the way) that I realized I had a problem.

That day I got mad. I wasn’t less of a person. There was NO reason for me to lower my head and apologize for breathing the same air as this gentleman. It was on this day that my quest for higher self esteem began.

If you happen to think, “Hey! That’s me too,” I have good news for you!
You don’t have to apologize anymore, unless you want to.

Four Thoughts to Turn Your Thinking Around

I am very fortunate to have a therapist in my family, so I went straight to my mom and said, “How do I feel better about myself?”

I was going through a really tough time in my life. I was having trouble in my marriage. I felt like I had no idea who I was and why I felt so bad about myself—why I felt like less of a person.

My therapist mother told me to start with The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz

1. Be Impeccable With Your Word

“Avoid using words to speak against yourself, or to gossip about others. Use the power of your word in the direction of truth and love, always.”

Working on mastering the first agreement was what turned it all around for me and my self esteem started improving. When I noticed that I was beating myself up, I was able to correct it and use my words “in the direction of truth and love.”

You don’t have to apologize for taking up space when you realize you have value in the world.
YOU DO HAVE VALUE!

2. DON’T TAKE ANYTHING PERSONALLY

“Nothing other people do is because of you. It is because of themselves. All people live in their own dream, in their own mind; they are in a completely different world from the one we live in. When we take something personally, we make the assumption that they know what is in our world, and we try to impose our world on their world.”

There is great relief in learning not to take the negative actions of others personally when their actions seem directed at you. It is their drama, not yours.

3. DON’T MAKE ASSUMPTIONS

Don’t assume other people know what you are thinking and don’t assume you know what they are thinking.

“We make all sorts of assumptions because we don’t have the courage to ask questions.”

4. ALWAYS DO YOUR BEST

“Just do your best–in any circumstance in your life. It doesn’t matter if you are sick or tired, if you always do your best there is no way you can judge yourself. And if you don’t judge yourself there is no way you are going to suffer from guilt, blame, and self-punishment. By always doing your best, you will break a big spell you have been under.”

I am bound and determined that the words Sorry Sarah will NOT be on my gravestone!

“My life will not be an apology. It will be a statement.”-Andy Andrews

You don’t have to apologize for your dreams!

You don’t have to apologize for being you!

Grab a copy of The Four Agreements: A Practical Guide to Personal Freedom (A Toltec Wisdom Book) Break the old agreements you have with yourself and replace them with these life changing ones!

I would love for you to come connect with me at I Am A Powerful Woman.

Sarah
I Am A Powerful Woman

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How Did I Get Here?

Flame Tattoo

Hey! Who put that there?

Do you ever feel like that?  How did I get to this place in my life?  How did we end up in this situation?  How did that huge flame tattoo end up as a permanent part of my body?

I have been scratching my head for a couple of years at how I came to be in this place in my life. How did I end up the mother of 5 children?  How have we survived all of these years on one income and especially the last couple of years?  And now more than ever It feels like it all just happened to me–that I was not an active participant.  But that’s not true.  It has all been a series of choices and reactions to choices and thoughts about reactions to choices.  I recently read the book The Traveler’s Gift by Andy Andrews and he has many good things to say about how we end up where we end up and what we can do from this point if we want to be successful.

“By disclaiming responsibility for our present, we crush the prospect of an incredible future that might have been ours.”  The Traveler’s Gift

I highly recommend the book!

Crazy things do happen to us.  Marriages fall apart, people get sick and die.  There is very little in this life that we have control over.  But we get to choose how we react to the crazy circumstances and we have control over ourselves.

How does all of this fit with a picture of my big flaming tattoo?  I’m not sure exactly.  Somehow in my mind–it does.

To me, my super sized tattoo represents walking through trials–walking through the flames and not being burned.  My husband and I walked through these same fiery trials 6 years ago.  I thought we both made it out unscathed.  My mom, who tried desperately to thwart my efforts to get inked, calls this my battle scar.  These are the verses that inspired my tat.

When you pass through the waters,
I will be with you;
and when you pass through the rivers,
they will not sweep over you.
When you walk through the fire,
you will not be burned;
the flames will not set you ablaze..–Isaiah 43:2

It also represents growing in those trials.  If I had my druthers, I’d really rather not do all of this growing.

“These trials are only to test your faith,
to show that it is strong and pure. It
is being tested as fire tests and purifies
gold, and your faith is far more precious to
God than mere gold. So if your faith remains
strong after being tried by fiery trials,
it will bring you much praise and glory and
honor on the day when Jesus Christ is revealed
to the whole world.” I Peter 1:7

Anybody want to go bike shopping?

But it also doubles nicely as a biker momma tattoo if I ever take up riding!

We are POWERFUL women taking this life one day at a time, fiery trials and all.  We have made choices to get to this point in our lives and there are always choices available to us at any given moment.  I choose to learn from people who have already been down this road.  I choose to live a full life as long as there is breath in my lungs.  I will survive in the words of Gloria Gayner.

Do you have any battle scars?  What is the meaning behind your tattoos if you have them?  If you don’t have one, but if you were going to get one, what would it be?  Come over to facebook and tell me about it.

 

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