You Don’t Have to Apologize
I have been known to take responsibility and apologize for many things that are not my fault. I was dubbed Sorry Sarah in fourth grade because I constantly said, “I’m sorry.”
It was not until I apologized for walking near someone in the grocery store (I wasn’t even in the way) that I realized I had a problem.
That day I got mad. I wasn’t less of a person. There was NO reason for me to lower my head and apologize for breathing the same air as this gentleman. It was on this day that my quest for higher self esteem began.
If you happen to think, “Hey! That’s me too,” I have good news for you!
You don’t have to apologize anymore, unless you want to.
Four Thoughts to Turn Your Thinking Around
I am very fortunate to have a therapist in my family, so I went straight to my mom and said, “How do I feel better about myself?”
I was going through a really tough time in my life. I was having trouble in my marriage. I felt like I had no idea who I was and why I felt so bad about myself—why I felt like less of a person.
My therapist mother told me to start with The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz
1. Be Impeccable With Your Word
“Avoid using words to speak against yourself, or to gossip about others. Use the power of your word in the direction of truth and love, always.”
Working on mastering the first agreement was what turned it all around for me and my self esteem started improving. When I noticed that I was beating myself up, I was able to correct it and use my words “in the direction of truth and love.”
You don’t have to apologize for taking up space when you realize you have value in the world.
YOU DO HAVE VALUE!
2. DON’T TAKE ANYTHING PERSONALLY
“Nothing other people do is because of you. It is because of themselves. All people live in their own dream, in their own mind; they are in a completely different world from the one we live in. When we take something personally, we make the assumption that they know what is in our world, and we try to impose our world on their world.”
There is great relief in learning not to take the negative actions of others personally when their actions seem directed at you. It is their drama, not yours.
3. DON’T MAKE ASSUMPTIONS
Don’t assume other people know what you are thinking and don’t assume you know what they are thinking.
“We make all sorts of assumptions because we don’t have the courage to ask questions.”
4. ALWAYS DO YOUR BEST
“Just do your best–in any circumstance in your life. It doesn’t matter if you are sick or tired, if you always do your best there is no way you can judge yourself. And if you don’t judge yourself there is no way you are going to suffer from guilt, blame, and self-punishment. By always doing your best, you will break a big spell you have been under.”
I am bound and determined that the words Sorry Sarah will NOT be on my gravestone!
“My life will not be an apology. It will be a statement.”-Andy Andrews
You don’t have to apologize for your dreams!
You don’t have to apologize for being you!
Grab a copy of The Four Agreements: A Practical Guide to Personal Freedom (A Toltec Wisdom Book)
I would love for you to come connect with me at I Am A Powerful Woman.
Sarah
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